29th November, South East UK.
Received anonymously via email:
“It’s dark and rainy and we’ve visited about seven farms trying to find out some important information. Sadly, all the work accounts to nothing as we have not managed to find what we needed. We approach the last farm knowing it isn’t what we are looking for, but we feel like we should have a look anyway.
Over the electric fence and into what people think free range farms look like. This is top of the top, orchard planted free range chicken egg farm. We’ve seen them before. The kind of farm that helps the middle class feel better about their animal abuse.
We peek inside one of the sheds and realise that there are chicks inside. When opening the door one of them decides to come out. She is a master escapee. We look around, amongst the dead birds and cover our nose to avoid smelling the intense ammonia. If only the grass-fed, free-range enlightened middle class could smell this. It isn’t what we are looking for, se we go back to the door. That same chicken insists on getting out once again, so we oblige. We are not prepared to home multiple chickens, but she is adamant and wants to leave, so we stick her under the armpit and walk away with her.
She’s inquisitive, she adapts to every challenge and, unsurprisingly, she is unwilling to be contained, so she has become a house chicken. No pen will stop her. She is one of many animals who broke free and decided their fait.
This was not a raid, but a mere show of camaraderie and accompliceship. She wanted out, we gave her a ride.
December has started and there is a month to finish the year. We hope you all are preparing huge hits for the holiday season.
Swiss ALF and comrades, SHOW US WHAT YOU’VE GOT!”